The RRA Returns: to do battle with the lizard
by Voldy's Worst Nightmare
Summary: Voldy has a habit of forming empathy links with her husbands, so the RRA aren’t surprised when she takes over the TARDIS controls and the girls make a grand return to Camelot to aid Merlin against the dragon. Rated for randomness!


The RRA Returns: to do battle with the lizard

**Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin; if I did Merlin would've insisted that the dragon didn't destroy Camelot, which is why the RRA return in the first place.**

**Summary: Voldy has a habit of forming empathy links with her husbands, so the RRA aren't surprised when she takes over the TARDIS controls and the girls make a grand return to Camelot to aid Merlin against the dragon.**

**What they are surprised about, however, is the result of Voldy's latest potion.**

**Will Merlin be able to cope with the Dragon, the RRA and Voldy's new magic?**

**Christmas One-shot for the RRA.**

**Review!**

…

"Merlin!"

Voldy suddenly grabbed the TARDIS controls and started putting the combination in for Camelot.

"Voldy what the hell are you doing?" Mysty demanded, "We're supposed to be going to Sherwood!"

"Sorry," Voldy replied, not looking at her sister or sounding apologetic at all, "But Merlin's stupidly released the Dragon."

"He's what?" Maple demanded, coming through from the torture room, where the Sheriff and Isabella were screaming in agony.

"Released the dragon?" Paula asked, coming in from another part of the TARDIS, "what for?"

"He promised," Voldy shrugged, "And now he has to keep that promise. Unfortunately that means that Camelot is doomed unless –"

"Unless we get there beforehand," Mira nodded, having come from the torture room to see what was going on, "Well, we've got the weapons, we've got the motive," she grinned, "Let's go dragon hunting."

The TARDIS hurtled through the time vortex towards its destination.

…

"Merlin, what's happened?"

"I don't know," Merlin replied, looking completely blank, "The Dragon's escaped –"

"He's what?" Arthur demanded; he would have said more but he was interrupted by a loud mechanical grinding noise that he knew all too well.

"Merlin!" Voldy yelled, almost knocking the young warlock over with the force of her hug, "What's going on? What the hell were you thinking?" she demanded, looking murderous, "You _saw_ what would happen through the crystal, for god's sake – _why_ did you do it?"

Merlin disentangled himself from his wife, "Sorry," he muttered.

"You're sorry?" Voldy laughed, verging on hysterics, "The Dragon's about to destroy Camelot and all you have to say is _sorry_?" she laughed again.

"Wait," Arthur paused as the other girls came out of the TARDIS, smiling appreciatively at Voldy for her sarcasm, "are you saying that _Merlin_ was responsible for this?"

"Obviously," Deannie replied, rolling her eyes as Mysty and Annie started to fight over the unfortunate prince, with L.C hitting her head against her palm behind them, "Otherwise she wouldn't be shouting at him,"

The Dragon swooped low over their heads, causing them to duck. Maple, who had been holding a vial of swirling silver liquid, dropped it, causing the contents to splash onto Voldy.

"Sorry," she said; Voldy shrugged, showing that it didn't matter.

"Don't worry about it," she replied, shrugging.

"Ladies," L.C interrupted, pointing at the Dragon, "We have an over-sized lizard to kill,"

on that note, the RRA girls who weren't pre-occupied with fighting over or shouting at husbands produced various weapons, most of which had been stolen from Daleks, Cybermen and Klingons from visits to other worlds, and converged on the battlements of Camelot castle.

The Dragon swooped again, enjoying terrorising the citizens of Camelot, and nearly killed Merlin.

"Hey!" Voldy yelled, glaring at the Dragon acidly, "Leave him alone!" her eyes flashed silver and the air around the dragon exploded; the Dragon himself roared in pain and flew upwards in an attempt to cool his wounds with the high altitudes. The other RRA girls fired, hitting the Dragon at the exact wound points, before staring incredulously at Voldy, who was a little preoccupied with asking Merlin what the spell for blowing things up was.

"Come on," she insisted, "if we both do it, we can kill the lizard!"

"It's a dragon, Voldy," Arthur corrected, "and did you say –?"

"It's not a dragon!" Voldy snapped back, her eyes glinting dangerously, "A dragon wouldn't be destroying a whole town because of a quarrel with one man living in it! That – _thing_ there is _not_ a dragon!"

"You don't want to correct Voldy when it's about dragons," Mysty commented, "She was kind of obsessed with them when she was a kid,"

"That's because dragons – real ones, not wannabe lizards – are awesome," Voldy replied, whirling to face the "dragon".

"If you won't tell me the spell for explosion," Voldy told Merlin, "At least tell me the spell for bringing stone things to life,"

"But –"

"Just do it, Merlin!" Arthur yelled, accompanied by Mysty and Annie.

Merlin nodded and whispered the spell in Voldy's ear.

They turned together, and in one voice they called; "_Bonbai, adorthai, arisan quickain!_"

The stone creatures in Camelot came to life at their command and converged on the Dragon, aided by the RRA girls' weapons of mass destruction.

Eventually, the Dragon roared and was swamped and pinned to the ground, where he was chained down by the waiting Maple and Mira.

"Where'd you get unbreakable chains from?" Voldy asked when the Dragon had been transported to Alagaesia for safe-keeping (and pointed in the direction of Galbatorix's castle in case he got the urge to destroy something).

"How d'you think your two demon dogs are leashed up?" Mira replied, grinning.

"You stole them from Caleb's kennel?"

"Yes, we did,"

Voldy nodded, "then I dread to think what state the underworld is in," was her response, knowing the capabilities of her two demon pets.

"Don't worry about that," Maple grinned with a voice of false innocence; "We put them in a room with the Sheriff and Isabella – we thought they'd like the company,"

Voldy sighed, "I would perform the act of head-desking, but there isn't a desk around here for me to hit."

The RRA laughed and, after Mysty and Annie agreed that the next time they visited Camelot they would clone Arthur for Annie, retreated back into the TARDIS to begin the return to Sherwood.

Just before they left, Voldy stuck her head out of the door.

"And Arthur," she added, "Yes, Merlin is a very powerful wizard, and has been using his magic to save your life and do the chores and stuff, but if I ever find out that you turned him in or told anyone else who turned him in," her happy face turned into a glare, "then I'll come back here and, regardless of what Annie and Mysty'll do to me, I'll hang you by the larger of your male parts from the battlements," she went back to her sweetly-smiling face, "Clear?"

Arthur nodded, "Clear,"

Voldy beamed, "lovely," she waved cheerily at them both, "bye now!" she ducked back in and the door closed as the TARDIS vanished, leaving a small square of un-scorched earth behind.

"Sorcery, eh?" Arthur asked.

"Yup,"

"And you were saying that sorcery was evil?"

Merlin looked hurt, "some of it is!" he insisted, "That's what I've been protecting you from!"

"Y'know what?"

"What?"

Arthur smiled.

"I can't believe I didn't notice.

-Merlin-

"So, Voldy," L.C began casually, leaning back on the sofa with a glass of Cola in her hand and an impish smile on her face, "When are you going to explain this empathy link thing?"

Voldy shrugged, "no idea how it works," she replied, "Absolutely none,"

"But, Voldy," Paula pressed, "we have more important questions to answer,"

"Like?"

Paula grinned, "Kirk or Spock?"

Voldy grinned, "Would you kill me if I gave you my honest answer?"

Paula raised her eyebrows, "Spock?"

"Nope," Voldy's grin turned impish, "Chekov."

The RRA laughed as Voldy was promptly attacked by Paula's and Josie's pillows and fell off her chair with an indignant 'eep!'

…

**There it is! My first one-shot! *throws confetti* Yay!**

**I have to say that it was slightly random, but hey; that's how we roll :P**

**To the lovely girls of the RRA; you guys are totally awesome and will ALWAYS be very, very special. Love you guys to pieces!**

**And yes, Paula and Josie, I am team Chekov. *runs away as thoughts of Paula and Josie working together for her destruction enter her mind* Nyaha.**

**Click this green button here *points* you know you want to!**


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